You were the first person I gave myself to in a long time.
It wasn’t intentional, it really just happened.
Everything happened so effortlessly, you were so familiar
I suddenly became addicted in such a short time.
I never told anyone this but you’re the reason I smoke cigarettes
You’re the reason I drink coffee religiously now
I remember your kisses, they were my favorite. They left the taste of Marlboro and black coffee in my mouth
I never wanted it to leave
I had to find a way to taste it all the time.
I hope you’re happy because you deserve it
I rather you happy than me, because I’m more familiar with sad and being hurt. I kind of know how to deal with it now.
I’m used to it.
I hope if I ever am loved again, it’s by someone like you
But I really hope I’m not ever loved again.
You’re lovely, my dear.
I hope you miss me."